Married folks, listen up. You can never, not ever stop dating the one you love and said “I do” to. This is a commandment you will not find written in stone or said when wedding vows are exchanged, but we think it should be. We wholeheartedly believe the key to a joy-filled marriage and keeping a marriage alive and strong is to always date your spouse.
Always date your spouse.
For 80 years, our grandparents lived happily together. They were very good at dating each other and keeping their marriage alive and strong. Even when getting ready for a wild and crazy night at the bingo hall playing bingo, they dated well and were intentional. Our grandmother always wanted to look her best, whether it was for my grandfather or others, he always reaped the rewards of her preparation. Her hair was always perfect, red lipstick was always applied and the perfume she sprayed, which was my grandfather’s favorite, was heavenly. She also made sure my grandfather wore something clean – not something he played softball in that morning. Our grandfather always opened the door for her for a grand entrance into wherever they were going.
Our grandparents had a beautiful marriage. Their actions were intentional. They were connecting to one another and lived a happy life together. This is gentle reminder to us that it doesn’t matter if you’ve been married 80 hours, 80 days or 80 years. Dating your spouse should be intentional and can be as simple as going to the bingo hall to play a few rounds of bingo together and taking the time to apply your husband’s favorite scent of perfume.
Effects of COVID-19.
Life has certainly changed since COVID-19, including dating your spouse. There has been one positive effect of the 2020 pandemic in our households when it comes to dating your spouse. We call it house dating. While quarantined, we have breakfast with our spouses, watch the morning news together, partake in a glass or two of bubbly before dinner and have conversation. We’re talking real conversations about our needs, desires, wants and goals.
We also talk about the places we plan to travel to after it is safe to venture out again. Overnight trips are always on the top of our list. COVID-19 made us slow down and really live life together, and it was the only positive effect to this Thanos of a virus. We find ourselves doing stuff with our spouses (their language of love), which we believe is a form of dating your spouse. Don’t you think? Our spouses certainly do!
Life’s real priority.
We have to make time for our spouses. Remember when you first started dating the one you said “I do” to? No discussions about bills, the kiddos’ schedules, grocery lists and dirty socks that didn’t make it to the hamper. Dating was a priority in your life. Everyone, and we mean everyone, wants to be pursued and feel as if they are life’s real priority. Don’t allow your relationship to become boring and lame. Binge watching HULU in your PJ’s every weekend will not make your spouse feel pursued or that they are life’s real priority. Ain’t no cupid flying around for that kind of night.
Connect with your spouse and keep that connection alive by staying attune to what brings them joy, by having conversation, being adventurous and trying new things, and cherishing your partner each and every day. Make them life’s real priority. 80 years of marriage with a connection and making your spouse a real priority will be the fairytale marriage we have all read and dreamt about. A true example of this was our grandparent’s marriage.
Top 5 Dating ideas from us married gals.
Dating your spouse takes effort. We have complied our top 5 dating tips for our readers. If you are not already practicing these tips, start now.
- Ask your spouse out on a date . Literally, ask your spouse out on a date. Get out of the house and every day life for a few hours and go for a car ride or an outdoor restaurant (our favorite is The Bistro for dinner and Blue Flour for Saturday brunch). Our grandmother loved date night and she made every occasion date night. She would apply her red lips, put on something fabulous just to step outside of the house with our grandfather. Remember, 80 years of a marriage takes effort.
- Write a love note to your spouse. Love notes are instant smiles and it’s ok to be cheesy with your words. Everyone remembers those cheesy pickup lines. Search for one that you found worked and use it in your love note! Place an “I love you” sticky note in your husband’s wallet and see what kind of happiness that brings.
- Hold hands and hug often. We totally believe hugging reduces stress, fear and anxiety because when you hug, neurons are share which is good for the brain. It’s science and it’s awesome!
- It’s important to carve out purposeful time with each other during the week by setting a time each day or one day during the week to check-in. Listen to your spouse and try to do what they need out of affection and not obligation.
- Plan an overnight trip. Leave the kiddos at home and make it an adventurous getaway or a lazy, relaxing getaway. Get away from the day-to-day life and enjoy just being together.
Perfect location for an overnight getaway.
Looking for the perfect getaway for your overnight trip? Well, look no further because have the perfect spot at Lakeside Pink at Lake Murray. Spend relaxing days lakeside with amazing sunsets under a covered gazebo. Enjoy your morning coffee and beautiful lake views from the second story balcony off of the master bedroom. Nighttime fires with a glass of wine from the newly built fire pit, or enjoy the covered patio and grill and prepare a dinner for two. The options are endless at Lakeside Pink, the perfect location for a getaway, for you and your spouse!
You just have to do it.
Dating should be one you make often, if not always. Be intentional and in pursuit of your spouse. We know this is hard and takes mounds of effort, which is why you have read the word “intentional” many times in this article. We know first-hand that life gets complicated, overly busy and sometimes overwhelming but you just have to do it. You can resolve those complicated, busy and sometimes overwhelming days with just a hug. We suggest you try dating tip #3 when life gets to be too much. Your brain and your life will be much happier if you do.